by Sara Mendez
In my job, I've helped a lot of people quit smoking. And I've heard a lot of reasons why smoking is a good thing.
Smoking helps you think, relaxes you, de-stresses you, keeps you from getting upset at your family, tastes good with coffee, tastes really good after a meal. Basically, makes things "better" and makes you feel "better".
I know you don't completely believe these reasons, or why know you should quit smoking. I also know a part of you DOES believe these things, and more.
A part of you MUST believe your reasons or you would have quit smoking by now. Now may be a good time to know there are no laws that say your reason to keep smoking has to make sense. They rarely do.
You've probably already proven your reasons untrue. Smoking might taste better with coffee because the coffee taste on your tongue covers the bad taste of smoking???
Even when you know the reason doesn't make sense, that knowledge doesn't always help you stop. It might just add to your frustration in the struggle to stop. Just one more reason to stop that doesn't out-weigh the craving to continue.
It's basically about two things. The motivation that smoking will make you feel better and the feeling that you're trying to feel better than. That is all.
If you're too hot, you look for ways to cool off. If you're leg hurts you look for pain relief. If you feel bad (tired, stressed, overwhelmed, angry, lonely, whatever…) you look to feel good. If you have held the belief that smoking makes you feel good, that's where your mind takes you.
This is an only slightly simplified explanation of a craving. Most smokers have more than one type of craving like, the 'first thing in the morning' craving feels different than the 'after lunch' craving. But the same model applies.
SO, how do you change these things? I can write on and on about this (and I have on my web site) It will come down to changing the feelings, motivations and beliefs involved.
First, feeling bad needs to be looked at and helped. If it's stress, get it managed, if it's a bad situation, do what you can to fix it or get help.
Second, you belief that smoking helps you feel good (it's probably the innocent mistake that smoking equals being an adult, in control, strong, capable, etc…) In truth, a cigarette is a plant leaf and chemicals wrapped in paper. The good feeling you're anticipating from smoking is created by your mind. YOU make yourself feel better when you smoke. So it only makes sense that you can make yourself feel good by doing something that is healthy. If, your mind believes it makes you feel good.
And there's the trick for most people. Successfully quitting smoking is much easier after changing these emotional connections. People don't often think of this. That is why the success rate of medication and nicotine replacement alone is so poor. The only current exception is Chantix and even Pfizer, the makers of Chantix, recommend behavior modification along with their medication.